50 the new 30? I don't think so!!

Some people like to band it around that 50 is the new 30.

They are sorely mistaken.

When I was 30, I could sleep pretty much anywhere at the drop of a hat, no matter what cocophany of sound was present, no matter how many people may be sprawled around the room. Nowadays I need complete quiet - no snorers within earshot - my nice therma-therapeutic pillow to support my neck and a cozy bed. No more sleeping on hard wooden decks for these bones.

This is up for me as sleep has become more and more of an issue as I have reached these pesky menopausal years. 3 days with less than 5 hours good rest and I feel like a walking zombie; ungrounded, easily irritated, foggy, easily sad.

This week, with a lot on my mind as I prepare for not only a 7 week excursion to Asia but also my birthday parties, I have resorted to the miracle of modern science - sleep aids!

aaaahhhh...

Let me tell you, the world looks SO different after 8 hours sleep!

So today I am optimistic, energetic and ready for anything again!

Short blog today - I am heading to the Delta - enjoy this gorgeous summer weather while it lasts!

Who dressed me??

I don't know who dressed me yesterday but they got it wrong - seriously wrong. I was in the post office at the counter buying stamps when a lady came up to me and said,

"Can I zip you up?"

"What?" I asked, feeling a little taken aback.

"Your dress is undone!"

It was true. The zipper had come down exposing my back for all to see, almost down to my knickers. Taking a deep breath and ignoring the stares and sniggers, I nodded and she calmly rendered me decent. How had I not noticed that I was half naked?

I know, I know - the jokes and comments will fly here... we all know Julia loves to run around naked.. but not in the post office! Her own home or Harbin maybe.....well, quite certainly.

All this led me to wonder if I have started to lose it. Or was I just so stuck in my head with a million thoughts swirling around yesterday that I did not notice my wardrobe malfunction!

Am curious if any others of you over 40 have had similar tales of forgetfulness. I do sometimes walk into a room and wonder what the hell I'm doing there. But I think I've always done that! I also notice that stress makes my mind foggier where I am more apt to be forgetful, whereas when I am relaxed and the mind is calm, I generally have much more clarity in my daily undertakings.

Am not ready for complete blotting out yet... but will have to check my attire before heading out into the outside world more carefully in future!

aging crisis

Perplexing things are happening. I woke up yesterday morning with a brand new blemish under my eye. It looks like a pimple but is not a pimple. However it is equally red and obtrusive. As it happened, I trotted off today today for my annual pap smear - you know - the one where the nice lady doctor greases up her speculum and shoves it up your vajayjay with no small degree of force, eliciting a soft yelp from yours truly who is thinking of England and trying to be brave.

Actually its the only foreign object that has been up there recently so I tried to enjoy it.... until the nice lady doctor greased her finger well and good and shoved it up my arse. What was she looking for? ETs?

With a smug grin on her face she said,"All done now. We'll let you know in 2 weeks if anything is wrong."

"Thanks," I said. "But can you tell me what this strange red mark is that has appeared on my face?"

"Oh yes - that is a spider angioma. You get that from over-exposure to the sun. I'm afraid you'll just have to live with it - or try and get a dermatologist to laser it off."

Oh great. Now I have to spend hundreds of dollars to get fried at some swanky dermatologist's office to try and restore my otherwise flawless (ha ha!) complexion!

And that is the thing.... Aging costs money! The face and neck creams, the bio-identical hormones, the dermatologists... it gets expensive!

On the brighter front, they weighed me at the doctor's office and I came in at 133 lbs... that's 9 stone 7 lbs if you are English. And yes. There are English people reading this blog, so there.

That is exactly the same weight as when I was 18. But here's the funny thing - I don't look like when I was 18 any more. My thighs have weird hanging bits that sag and swing. My belly protrudes for much of the day and looks plain fat from my perspective. So how come I weigh the same but look so different? I guess it's all just redistributed itself.

I am, however, a full inch taller than when I was 18. I pit it down to great chiropractors and lots of yoga to lengthen the spine.

I'm actually preparing right now for my biggest ever yoga retreat up at Harbin hot springs. - we have 20 people coming... and was digging through my old photo albums looking for my Bali album to bring..I found a 10 year old Costa Rica album - now that was depressing... I looked great then! Why did I think I didn't?

I am consoling myself with the thought that when I am 63 I will look back on this time, 10 years ago, and think ' Oh - I looked great at 53 - why did I not know that then?"

And that's the moral of my musings - it's all relative folks.....

Ok.. off to prepare for Harbin...

Bhakti Fest

I just returned from BhaktiFest in Joshua Tree near Palm Springs- a yogic shindig of 4 days of chanting, yoga classes, lectures and vendors. I was a bit doubtful about the wisdom of heading to the desert in summer and indeed it was hot... but the thunderstorm that dropped an inch of rain right before Krishna Das performed outside was the big shocker.. guess who had left their fly off their tent!

As the downpour unleashed its full fury, stage hands frantically tried to get instruments and electrical items off that stage that with its high pylons, was a definite attractor for lightening.... They made it... and we all piled into a smaller building and waited for them to set up again. By that time it was 11pm and I was ready for bed! So after one song from Krishna Das, I wearily slunk back to my somewhat wet tent and tried to find some dry blankets and get some sleep.

Not everyone else. The age demographic was mostly 20-35 and they all stayed up all night long, chanting, dancing and generally having a fine old time.

But that was not the what made me feel the most old. I swear some Hindu Deity picked the slimmest, trimmest, most gorgeous babes it could find up and down the west coast and plunked them all in the desert for this festival! Now under normal circumstances, I often feel relatively small compared to others wandering around the K street Mall. But here I felt clumsy, fat and old. And to make it worse, the yoga practices I attended consisted of what seemed like an infinite amount of cookie-cutter sun salutations that soon had me worn out in the heat and resting in child's pose whilst all around me continued to jump around. Very humbling. Not the practice for older joints for sure....

On a brighter front, I am now the proud owner of some very trendy new yoga pants - the kind that have a slit up the side and a skirt that covers a multitude of sins. At least I can look the part!

Seriously folks, there were some wonderful teachers there and I enjoyed the event immensely and may even speak there myself next year. But what was on offer was clearly aimed at the younger generation and myself and my traveling companion felt that gap in what appealed.

OK off to teach a class - in my hot new pants - more soon.....

preparations....

There are some secret blog readers out there... you know who you are. You don't comment necessarily on this page, but when I run into you in town you mention the blog and your opinions. Great! I am happy to have you all reading this and keeping up with plans for the book and the trip.

So here is what' s happening.

My friend, Janice, who is coming with me to Galapagos was visiting last week and we had a planning session. We are going to trust that the universe will provide us with exactly the right boat if we wait to book till nearer the time so we can get the best deal possible. We may even wait until we actually arrive on the islands...

And as we are in Ecuador and there is lots more to see than just Galapagos, we have been looking at where else to go. There is the option of a trip to the Amazon National Park to visit the indigenous tribes and see wildlife. I was feeling very excited about that... until I started to check out some blogs from people who had actually been there!

Here is the problem. I am TERRIFIED of spiders and on this particular blog, up close and personal, were pictures of the biggest, most terrifying critters you have ever seen in your life!!! Oh and some of them are poisonous...and nothing to protect you from them except some flimsy mosquito net with a few holes in it here and there. Hhmmmm.

Maybe if I was younger I would jump at this chance to go to the Amazon...but I have to say that at my ripe old age I am having second thoughts! No air conditioning in the swamp, hiking in extreme humidity, dodgy food....well the jury is still out on whether we will go or not.. we will decide again when we get to Ecuador if this is a suitable option!

If YOU have been down there and braved the Amazon jungle, I would love to hear from you!

Some good news.. my Mother was just visiting and bought me an early birthday present of a fabulous new roller bag/backpack! Now this was an invention we didn't have 20 years ago....

I can roll it or carry it! How cool is that! Even comes with a detachable daypack.

Think I'll take it to Asia with me next month and give it a test run...

Ok more book next time...