dave part 3

And so it came to pass that Dave took me to the movies.

There was something different about him when I saw next...he looked more handsome to me, but it took me a while to figure out why - he had shaved! All that was left was a small amount of hair on his chin. The rest was history. I complimented him on looking younger, not hiding behind the hair. He really did look tons better.

We saw J Edgar, the movie sitting next to each other but not touching, not holding hands. I felt comfortable beside him but was not feeling any desire for more closeness. Mutual enjoyment of the movie was feeling like plenty for me.

Afterwards, we went for a drink at the Elephant Bar. Drinking a mojito and having yet more sparkling conversation, I looked at him a little more deeply and felt a twinge of interest in my body, the beginnings of an attraction. Maybe I should look more deeply here. What if there was something here for me and I could not see the wood for the trees, colored as my judgment of him was my former experiences with large men in my life? During the course of conversation I discovered he had played golf on 7 continents, putted with Bill Clinton, jetted around the world building high-end golf courses. Not a run-of-the-mill man, this one. I was intrigued, but still resistant.

We walked back to his truck and as we parted, I leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the lips - soft lips, nice. I jumped out of his truck making no future plans,remaining non-committal. I thanked him for the lovely evening and drove home, noticing a warm feeling inside me.

Dave writes: We both had expressed an interest in seeing the movie about J. Edgar Hoover and so after a bit of schedule syncing, a time and place was suggested and agreed and we met at the appointed moment. She looked much more beautiful that I had remembered and the truth was I was really taken by her whole vibe. She picked perfect seats and we chatted and commented through the previews and settled into a good movie. Her energy was all around me and it felt nice, but when I would steal a glance, her body language was very closed. Sitting far away from me again. The possibility of some "date type" contact as benign as holding hands didn't seem any more possible than Lady Gaga calling me for music lessons. Nonetheless, we both enjoyed the movie and keyed on the same interesting parts.


We had talked about having a drink after the show and picked a place. I was rather shocked when she offered to jump in my vehicle, declaring that she trusted me. "Am I getting through to this woman?", I thought. Perhaps, but still she sat as far away from me as possible. We had a really enjoyable conversation over a nice yummy cocktail and I felt happy to have so much to talk about with her. Our combined world travels would certainly fill three books and we both had some cool stories to tell. I felt warm and wonderful.


As we left to walk to my car, I had the urge, once again, to just hold her hand. And as I looked for the possibility, Miss Julia, hands in pockets, was walking far enough away that my hand would never reach her. Not that into me. I get it. But at the same time we were having this great mental and spiritual connection. During our drink I had told her about my Stone Reiki work and so we revisited this subject quickly as a possibility for further connection. She leaned over, gave me a peckish kiss that only a sister could give a brother and off she went.


Here's what I wrote in an email that night:
Wonderful evening with you. Thank you so much. What a blessing you are.

I'm sure you can tell I have a crush on you. Not really sure how to handle myself with that. Kind of a new thing. Usually I'm the one who isn't feeling it. I find myself giving you lots of space when I actually want to be close.

Advice? :-) since you are the oracle.


Here's what she wrote back:
Good morning!
I am enjoying getting to know you very much - I feel very comfortable
with you. How wonderful you are feeling things...can you celebrate the
feeling without any attachment to outcome??
( I know - that's a hard one...)

You must be in my psychic space because I dreamed about you last night.
Anyway I am remaining open.
love j


Can I celebrate the feeling.....? Sure Julia, just like I can celebrate Salsa by looking at a Tomato and a couple Chillies. I get what she was saying, and I know this was a stretch for her, but I'm not the sort of man who doesn't step to a challenge. And really, isn't meeting someone who makes me feel this way enough to celebrate? Doesn't that make for a stitched deep sense of love? Perhaps I'm just a damn sap who should be ghost writing romance novels for lonely ladies in Florida to read by the pool. Or perhaps I need to shave my head, don the robes and train German shepherds with Monks of New Skete and never speak to another human female again. Confused and passionate at the same time it was time to take the 1 iron out of the bag and pure a low screamer into the wind, pin high to win the match.


My reply was perhaps one of the bravest things I have ever written:

Someone told me once that we put up walls not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down. And I think that goes hand in hand with getting what you need, but not always what you think you want.

I'm glad I found my way into your dream space. You've been speaking in mine since first writing from Asia.

You are special, Lady Julia. So am I. So when you ask if I can celebrate it makes me laugh because there is already a celebration.

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand. "I just wanted to be sure of you.”
― A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
I hope your day has surrounded you with love. Today your words surrounded me with special. Thank you.


After I pressed the send button on this beauty, I felt nothing but strength and peace. In my life, I've often been unable to be strong enough in my own voice. This was strong, loving language and I knew that it was determined, but not rude or pushy. I didn't want a "take it or leave it" kind of thing. And I didn't want to be one of those guys who related that they weren't looking for friendship. I simply and totally wanted to make sure I had been seen and for the most part, didn't feel like that had happened yet.